I’ll give you my dirty lil’ secret



Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. James 5:16

I was listening to a sermon by Juanita Bynum entitled ‘No more sheets,’ and basically it was about the consequences of fornication. In that sermon she said things that I really didn’t expect and those were things she, herself, wasn’t ready to part with. We all have deep, dark secrets that we are so ashamed of that we wouldn’t dare tell another person. These secrets are so mortifying that you cannot even re-live them in your mind. These secrets are unnecessary baggage and it’s time to let them go. Find somebody you trust and feel comfortable with and get it off your chest. Let them pray with you to find peace, freedom and joy, which is only found at the cross.

 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us [our] sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John1:9

But we serve a God who sees, Jehovah El Roi. He saw everything that you did and guess what, He still loves you. Usually when we wrong him we want to hide in the trees like Adam and Eve but Christ died so that our sins may be forgiven. All you need to do is confess and repent. Don’t let condemnation hold you hostage. We are no longer condemned, we can live life more abundantly. The bible says all sin is sin, there’s no bigger sin than another sin. If I kill and you tell a white lie, it’s all the same. Don’t think that what you did is so dirty that God will not forgive you. His love is unconditional, he doesn’t just love you when you are good. He loves you every minute, every second, he has loved you even before you were born.

He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy. Proverbs 28:13

He is the God of all flesh. He knows that we are weak and that we mess up. That doesn’t mean that when we fall into sin, we should stay there. You get up, dust yourself, confess, ask for forgiveness and repent. Don’t try pay for sins that Jesus died for on the cross.

I acknowledged my sin unto thee, and mine iniquity have I not hid. I said, I will confess my transgressions unto the LORD; and thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin. Selah. Psalms 32:5

There are secrets in me that have held me back in my walk with Christ. I lived a life of constant self-condemnation. I would remember all the horrible things I have done and tell myself I’m not worthy of God’s love. I would stop praying and worshipping him. But that would create a void in my life and I’d turn to sin to fill that void. That would leave me emptier than before. I’d pray and it would feel like just lip-service until I started to just confess to him and repent. It really saved me all the drama.


Date – 24/03/2014

Mood – Honest

Dedication – Hillsongs – I’m trading my sorrows, Michael W Smith – Grace

Baruch hashem Adonai


The ‘F’ word…Forgiveness


And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses Mark 11:25-26

This hasn’t been easy for me, been through so much and I have been too afraid to explore all the things in my life that need forgiving. I have always been a suppressor, when something happens, I just suppress and pretend it didn’t hurt. But I wasn’t doing anybody a favour, not even myself. Now that I’m baptised, I have got to let go of all that baggage. I am in Christ, old things are passed away and behold all things are made new. This includes all the bitterness and resentment that I have harboured for so long.

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger , and clamour , and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: Ephesians 4:31

They say unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the person that you are mad at to die instead. Unforgiveness is a self-made prison. The same way freedom is a choice. You don’t need the other party to come and apologise so that you can forgive them, you can choose to forgive them and let it go and continue with your life. It’s for your own good.

Behold, for peace I had great bitterness: but thou hast in love to my soul delivered it from the pit of corruption: for thou hast cast all my sins behind thy back Isaiah 38:17


God knows how many times I have needed his forgiveness and when I think about it, forgiving mankind is a small price to pay. Some of the stuff that we are holding onto are hindering all the things we need from coming to us. God forgives me when have forgiven others and when I pray with a clean heart he gives me whatsoever I desire according to his will.

And behold, they brought to him a man sick of the palsy, lying on a bed: and Jesus seeing their faith said unto the sick of the palsy; Son, be of good cheer; thy sins be forgiven thee Matthew 9:2

Imagine if the man sick with palsy had unforgiveness issues and because of them he would have missed his opportunity for healing from our Lord and saviour. Forgiveness is never easy but the Lord says his strength is made perfect in our weaknesses, ask God to help you let go of all your pain, his grace is sufficient for you. He will heal your heart and fill you with his perfect love. If you had strayed and you need his forgiveness, he is ready to forgive you. Just confess your sins to him and repent of them. We serve a God that is love.

To the lord our god belong mercies and forgivenesses, though we have rebelled against him; Daniel 9:9

Question: How many times must we forgive those that trespass against us?

Answer: Matthew 18:21-22

Date : 21/03/2014

Mood : Nostalgic

Dedication : Deborah – Ngikuxolele, Deitrick Haddon – Forgiven

Baruch hashem Adonai

If you have nothing nice to say…

ImageThe words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly. Proverbs 18:8


I have been watching the state of affairs amongst my classmates and I am inspired to address this issue. As people, we say so many things that are harmful to other people and we don’t realise that we are destroying those people. The adage they told us in pre-school was a lie, “Sticks and stones my break my bones, but nothing you say will hurt me.” You see, physical pain can heal but the vicious words uttered against you go into the innermost parts of the belly and they are hard to heal. You can try to laugh it off but deep inside you would have been wounded. This is where insecurities stem from. But this message isn’t for the victims of slander and gossip, it is for the perpetrators of such things. What they need to realise is that, gossips have deep-rooted issues inside of them. They need to find Jesus Christ and be rooted and grounded in love.


A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh Luke 6:45


I can’t squeeze the toothpaste and expect ice-cream to come out. In the same way, we can’t expect nice things to come out of bad places. Think before you spread vicious gossip, what does this say about me? What will I gain from saying this terrible thing? How would I feel if people were saying this about me? Take the time to just compliment another person instead. Just walk up to them and build them up. Let your words make somebody else’s day. Many people think I’m out of my mind. Just the other day, I was packed like a sardine in an Ipsum on my way to school and this girl’s elbow was stabbing my rib, I really wanted to say, “Nkazana, you might as well pay me 6 rand because I’m the one you are sitting on,” but instead I said, “You smell very nice, what’ the name of your perfume?” and her and I have been friends ever since.


Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man. Matthew 15:11


ImageMy hope for you today is that you may be a good-news messenger. May you bring encouragement and joy wherever you are. When you feel the need to say something awful about another person, realise that it’s a reflection of you as a person. When the urge comes over you to blurt out hurtful things, just decide to say something nice instead. Don’t focus on the bad aspects of people to try and hide your own insecurities. We have all had terrible things said about us and today let us go to God and ask him to heal us. He is Jehovah Rapha – our healer. Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you. If you are brave enough, take the time to apologise to the people you hurt with your words. With social networks, I know you can reach out to those people. God bless you.


Date – 20/03/14


Mood – Enlightened


Dedication – Benjamin Dube – Phindukhulume, Michael W Smith – Healing rain


Baruch hashem Adonai


Hold on, it gets better…

Image Image

Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you 1Peter 4:12

We have all gone through tough times, and some of you are in the midst of such trying times. But I’m here to tell you that you should get excited because it’s an opportunity to exercise your faith has arisen. We serve a God who is always there, Jehovah Shammah.When things get out of control, he is always in control. We need to learn to trust the Lord. He said you must cast all your cares upon him. Take all your issues to him in prayer. When you are weak, his strength is made perfect in your weakness. The pain is the plan. It is the will of God so please don’t blame the devil.

That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ 1Peter 1:7

What I have found makes life easier, is that when adversities come, I go into a time of intense worship and praise in spirit and in truth. There’s no point in focusing on the problem when I can praise the only one who can get me through it. There’s a reason he is called Jehovah Shalom, the God of peace. All you need is to be still and know that he is GOD. Look into the mirror and tell yourself, “This too shall pass.”


For our light affliction, which is but for moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory. 2Corinthians 4:17

The trial you go through is only for 2 minutes and the rewards are 58 minutes. Earthly trials for divine rewards.In the bible, when people got tried they reaped bountiful harvests. Esther is my favourite book. She is such an inspiration. In the face of tribulations, she declared a 3 day & night fast for herself and all the people. And she says, “And if I perish, I perish” (Esther 4:16). She sought the Lord first and then trusted in him completely. That’s all he really wants us to do really.Eerytime you get tried in an exam, you move on to the next level. Even in video games, before you go to the next level you need to defeat the obstacle at the end. Don’t focus on the problem, focus on the rewards.

My bretheren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience James 1:3

My hope for you today is that you learn to trust God. I hope you can learn to cultivate a vigorous prayer life. Talk to the LORD about anything and everything and let his peace flow into every aspect of your life. He loves you unconditionally and all he wants is to see you happy.


Date –19/03/2014

Mood – Grateful for grace

Dedication – Don Moen – God will make a way


Baruch HashemAdonai

Planning, Planning, Planning!

Isaiah-55-8-9For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it? Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it, all that behold it begin to mock him, Luke 14:28-29

As I turn 25 later on this year, I have been thinking about my life as a whole trying to take stock of how far along I am in the grand ‘plan.’ Well, I finish my degree this year (Glory be to God!) and the question now is “What’s next?” Planning is very important. I take it a little overboard with my obsessive compulsive tendencies but planning is what got me this far. The Word of God says,

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts Isaiah 55:8-9

God says my plans are not your plans. I learnt this lesson the hard way. Even Jonah would laugh at me. The world has set standards of how your life should go. By now I must be married and expecting a child. I’m seeing wedding bells all around me and it’s so easy to get pulled in to something you don’t want to do. In high-school they called it peer pressure. I’m glad that I have the support of my parents who continually propel me forward to excel in my studies. Growing up in a patriarchal society like I did, I know marriage right now will throw a spanner in the works. I want to use my degree, I want to travel and I want to find out who I am as an individual before inviting somebody else in to this party of one.

The bible says that before we are married, our main mandate to seek the Lord and serve him and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

There is difference also between the wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.1Corinthians 7:34

I think the high divorce rates nowadays are mainly attributed to the convenient marriages people enter to fulfil the norms outlined by society. Some women lose patience and settle for the first man that makes an offer. That wedding ring should mean something, it’s a sacred covenant between the two of you in front of God. Getting married too quickly and getting to know each other already in the marriage may prove disastrous. I digress. But my plan, God-willing, is to seek him more. I want to know his will and purpose for my life. I don’t want to stray from the path he has set out for me, The bible says,

“ The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his ways Psalms 37:23


My hope for you is that you may succumb to the will of God for your life. I pray that you may abandon your plans and hearken to his plans for you. Don’t spend your life in the whale because the world has told you what your life should look like. Let God take first place in your life. Let him take you from strength to strength. All he wants to do is make you prosper. He will ask for the impossible from you but he will make it possible. We serve a good and faithful God.

Date – 18/03/2014

Mood – Contemplating

Dedication –4Him – Hands and feet, Michael W. Smith – I surrender all

Baruch hashem Adonai

Friends or Foes?




Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.John 15:13


Friendship is a beautiful thing. The Lord has blessed me with amazing friends that love and worship him. But this hasn’t always been the case, befo

re being born again I had all kinds of friends. I was actually allergic to being alone. I could not stand the silence. As I got into the scripture, I realised that what I was actually missing was an intimate relationship with Christ. The bible doesn’t say don’t have friends but you will realise that everytime someone in the bible encountered God, they were alone. Salvation is not a group effort, it’s a personal journey and when you embark on it, you must be ready to prune the friend tree. The word cautions us about the kind of people we keep around us, it says,

Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”1 Corinthians 15:33


Everybody you meet can either add something to your life or subtract from your life. A true friend will never draw you away from the beliefs that you have. They say ‘birds of a feather flock together’ and this is very true. There’s a quote that says, “Show me your friends and I will tell you your character.” Today, when you look at your friends, are you proud to be associated with them? Are they an accurate reflection of who you are? Do they support you in your walk with Christ? The bible says that in times of need, we must pray for one another when they have faultered. It’s never easy to approach a total stranger, you’d need a friend that understands the Word and can carry you through in prayer.

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.Proverbs 27:17

Job 2:11 Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this evil that had come upon him, they came each from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. They made an appointment together to come to show him sympathy and comfort him.


Man has never been an island. It is impossible to try. I never understood why my mother tried so hard to always filter out my friends when I was young, looking back now in retrospect she made a good call. No judgment or anything like that but where those friends were going and where they are now is not what I had planned for my life. We all make decisions and for them that kind of life may be okay but I want more for myself. And honestly, when people want different things they will always clash. Watch what the bible says about how people must agree in order to walk together.

Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction? Amos 3:3


My hope for you today is that you find friends that guide you to where God wants you to be. Friends that enccourage you to be the best version of yourself. Friends that are filled with the wisdom of God from his word. May God bless you with friends like mine, who know without being told when I’m in dire need of prayer. May you realise that your best friend can be Jesus Christ and that he will never reject you nor forsake you.

Date- 17/03/2014

Mood – Blessed

Dedication – Solly Mahlangu – Wahamba nathi


Baruch Hashem Adonai


My Baptism


2Cor5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

On the 8th March 2014, I got baptised at the Northend swimming bath. It was amazing and I would like to thank the River of Life family for their outstanding support during this ,milestone in my life.

I first had to undergo baptism lessons whereby we were taught what baptism really means and what it implies.  Baptism is the start of a new life which will bring you great joy. It will give your life a renewed purpose. In an uncertain world, the God of Peace will give you peace.He is Jehovah Shalom – the God of peace.

For Christians, baptism represents the believer following Christ into His death, burial, and resurrection. The symbolism is perfect and filled with deep meaning. In baptism, the eyes are closed, the hands are folded, and breath is suspended as in death — if only for a moment. Then comes burial in the water; then resurrection from the watery grave to a new life in Christ. When raised from the water, the eyes open and breathing begins again. It’s a likeness of the resurrection.

Jesus when he resurfaced after the incident at the temple, he showed up to John the baptist to get baptised. He says in his Word that he is the way, the truth and the light. He set an example when he got baptised and we should follow suit. We are Christians meaning that we are Christ-like. Baptism is mandatory as a believer.

Can you imagine a man being accepted into the army of any country, if he refused to obey the orders of the Commander-in-Chief? Jesus Christ, the Christian Leader, said, “If you love me you will obey my command” (John 14:15). He also said, “Those who believe it (the gospel – the good news of his teaching) and receive baptism will be saved” (Mark 16:16). We must take Jesus at his word if we want to be accepted by him.

Mark 16:16

He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

Peter tells us, in Acts 2 and 3, that we must take five steps to salvation. They are:


  1. Believe in Jesus Christ and his message.
  2. Repent (have a change of mind, realising that we need God and His forgiveness).
  3. Be converted (turn round and walk towards God).
  4. Obey Jesus by having our sins washed away in baptism.
  5. Continue faithfully in God’s way (Acts 2:27-42; 3:18-21).

God always keeps His promises. He will never let us down. As Jesus said, “No one can snatch them out of the Father’s care” (John 10:29).

For me it was really fun and games until I was held underwater. I was so scared and cold. And I didn’t have the heavens open up and the Holy Spirit come upon me in the form of the dove but to me I know that something in me changed because the God i serve doesn’t lie. All the blessings that come with baptism I have already received and the heavens have smiled upon me.

Thank you LORD.

Date – 13/03/14

Mood – Happy

Dedication – Oh Happy Day – Benjamin Dube